Monday, May 20, 2024

Mara Moyo, a devoted daughter and extraordinary caregiver

  CHALI MULENGA 


Livingstone


Mara Moyo, a devoted daughter and extraordinary caregiver, has captured the hearts of many with her selfless commitment to her father's care. Her inspiring story of sacrifice and love sheds light on the profound impact of familial dedication and service to others.


Mara, now 31, recounts her upbringing in Livingstone, Zambia, under the influence of her father, Joseph Moyo, a beacon of compassion and service. "I grew up seeing a father who gave his all for the benefit of others. I just wanted to be like him," she recalls. Mara's father dedicated his life to uplifting vulnerable members of society, from street children to sex workers, leaving an indelible mark on Mara's values and aspirations.


Despite attending Nalituwe Primary School and David Livingstone High School, Mara's educational journey was intrinsically shaped by her father's impactful legacy rather than formal schooling. Mara fondly reminisces, "The foundation of my life was already being baked at home from what I saw my sweet dad do on a daily basis."


Mara's transition into nursing was a natural progression rooted in her father's influence and her desire to emulate his selflessness. "The inspiration came in two ways," Mara explains. "Firstly, it was the unselfish service and dedication I saw my dad do in my formative years of life." Witnessing her father's struggles with health issues further solidified Mara's decision. "I felt I needed to help my dad in whatever way possible after seeing him struggle even to move," she reveals.


The mantle of caregiving was not taken lightly by Mara, who became her father's primary caregiver upon her graduation in 2015. "My social life begins and ends with my sweet dad. I know no other social life except the one I have with him," she confesses, highlighting the profound impact of her commitment.


Mara's devotion extends beyond duty; it's a testament to unconditional love and faith. "To be my dad's nurse and caregiver is a special experience because, firstly, I am a daughter," Mara articulates. "I feel blessed because that's how I was raised."


Despite the challenges and sacrifices, Mara remains steadfast in her dedication. "Ours is until death do us part," she asserts, underscoring her unwavering commitment to her father's care.


Mara's story resonates deeply, reflecting the transformative power of love and the profound influence of familial bonds. Her advocacy for recognizing caregivers' contributions mirrors her father's ethos of service to humanity.


As Mara continues her journey, her narrative serves as a beacon of hope, reminding us of the enduring impact of love, sacrifice, and unwavering devotion in the face of adversity.


Mara's unwavering commitment to her father's care is a testament to the transformative power of love and familial bonds. 


Mara shares the evolution of her father's health, the deepening of their relationship through caregiving, and the profound lessons imparted by her father during their shared journey.


Reflecting on her father's health journey, Mara recalls, "It started around 2010, but by 2012, when I left for college, his condition began to decline." Mara's father, Joseph Moyo, initially experienced intractable hiccups and later battled back pain, insomnia, and deep vein thrombosis (DVT), eventually leading to his reliance on a wheelchair. Despite his health challenges, Joseph remained devoted to his charitable work, a testament to his unwavering dedication to serving others.


Through the lens of caregiving, Mara's relationship with her father has blossomed into a unique and special bond. "Nursing and caring for him has seen the blossom of our relationship," Mara explains. "Firstly, it was the unselfish service and dedication I saw my dad do in my formative years of life," Mara explains. She said he was ever surrounded by vulnerable people whom he sought to impact upon positively in their lives. "I accompanied my dad in his charitable missions and saw very sick people, especially HIV patients," Mara recalls. "Those are the people my dad sought to provide for." "As I was around grade 10, my dad began to develop health problems," Mara recounts. "I used to accompany him and saw nurses and other medical staff trying to assist him.""My dad later began to travel frequently to the USA for treatment under the assistance of Americans who used to come to Zambia under his organization," Mara explains. "Due to his health, airlines insisted on accompanying him as an at-risk passenger, which led to hiring sky nurses or sky escorts.""I thought to myself, if by the time I graduate and my dad is still sick, then I will save him huge sums in sky nurse's escort fees," Mara reflects. "That's how I entered nursing school.""The nursing training is invaluable," Mara emphasizes. "It gave me courage and prepared me to understand my dad's medical needs."Contrary to traditional African norms, Mara's role as a caregiver has brought them closer, forging a deep connection rooted in mutual support and companionship. "We laugh, joke, and chat together in my quest to keep him comfortable," Mara shares, highlighting the infectious positivity they share amid challenging circumstances.


Amidst her caregiving duties, Mara has gained invaluable wisdom from her father. "I grew up seeing him give his all, and now that I am spending time with him, I continue to gain wisdom through his experiences," she reflects. Mara emphasizes her father's passion for women's rights and empowerment, inspired by his belief in the inherent value of educated, empowered, and independent women.


Navigating her role as a caregiver in the community, Mara admits to feeling isolated but remains resilient. "It is a lonely journey," she admits, emphasizing the lack of local support. However, Mara finds solace in her family's unwavering support, acknowledging their vital role in her caregiving journey. "Excellent support," Mara affirms, highlighting the importance of familial bonds in sustaining her dedication.Mara's life revolves around a carefully orchestrated routine centered entirely on her father, Joseph Moyo, and his complex medical needs. Each day brings unique challenges and unwavering commitment to ensuring her father's well-being. "Every day is unpredictable when caring for a patient," Mara shares. "But my day begins with the essentials for my dad's comfort and health."Mara's day unfolds with a series of tasks vital to her father's care. Firstly, she assists him with bathing, ensuring he can safely use a bath stool suited to his needs. Next, Mara meticulously manages his multiple medications, essential for addressing his various chronic conditions and avoiding the risks of polypharmacy.


Her role extends beyond the home, as Mara arranges and accompanies her father to medical appointments. Navigating the challenges of wheelchair mobility becomes routine as Mara becomes her father's primary transporter and caregiver.


"Getting my dad outdoors for fresh air and sunshine is crucial," Mara emphasizes. "It's about finding that balance to promote his well-being without overexposing him."


The demands on Mara's social life are profound. Her dedication to her father leaves little room for personal pursuits outside their shared experiences.


"My social life is intertwined with my dad's," Mara admits. "I've sacrificed everything—love, family, and a conventional career—to be by his side."


Despite the challenges and sacrifices, Mara finds profound fulfillment in her role.


"My dad's social life is my social life," Mara reflects. "We support each other. He keeps me going just as much as I keep him going."


Mara's commitment spans nearly a decade, shaping her entire adult life.


"I've known no other life except caring for my dad," Mara says proudly. "It's an honor and a privilege to provide him with unwavering support."


As Mara celebrates milestones and reflects on her journey, her devotion to her father remains unwavering.


"In caring for my dad," Mara said, "I've found purpose, companionship, and a profound connection that defines my existence."


Looking ahead, Mara aspires to pursue preventive medicine, emphasizing community-based healthcare rooted in disease prevention and education. "I want to promote a healthcare system that prevents diseases through prevention and education," she explains, echoing her father's advocacy for proactive healthcare solutions.


Mara's story serves as an inspiring testament to the transformative impact of caregiving driven by love and compassion. "I would like this to be about love for each other, drawing from God's love for us," Mara shares, reflecting on her legacy of selfless dedication and unwavering love.


In the face of adversity, Moyo's journey exemplifies the extraordinary strength and resilience that love can inspire, leaving an indelible mark on those fortunate enough to witness her unwavering dedication to her father's care.


And in a heartfelt conversation, Mara opens up about the profound impact of caregiving on her life, revealing transformative lessons and deep personal growth cultivated through her dedicated journey as her father's caregiver.


Reflecting on her evolution, Mara shares, "Caring for my father has instilled in me a profound value for life and others. His life of service to others, putting their comfort above his own, has deeply influenced my perspective." Mara's father, Joseph Moyo, dedicated his life to serving the community, inspiring Mara to prioritize compassion and selflessness in her own life."The power of love fuels everything I do for my sweet dad," Mara emphasizes. "Without this deep love, I would have given up a long time ago."Mara's unwavering commitment to her father transcends mere duty; it's a lifelong promise—until death do them part. "Our bond is unbreakable," Mara shares. "I've made a vow to be there for him until the very end."  Her father's mantra—"The value of life is in what we do for others, not what they do for us"—resonates deeply with Mara, shaping her perspective on purpose and service."Love motivates actions far beyond the allure of a paycheck," Mara reflects. "It's about making a difference and being there for those who need it most."


To others in similar roles, Mara offers heartfelt advice: follow your heart. If the love is genuine, the sacrifices become worthwhile.


"When the time comes for my dad's final breath, I'll find solace in knowing I was there every step of the way," Mara shares with unwavering resolve.


Mara also advocates for greater recognition of caregivers by governments, highlighting their critical role in healthcare systems."I call on governments to acknowledge and support caregivers," Mara asserts. "They can alleviate hospital congestion and provide essential care within communities."Despite her father's challenging health conditions, including intractable hiccups and chronic pain, Mara remains dedicated to ensuring his comfort and well-being.


"My role is to make each day as comfortable as possible for my dad," Mara explains. "Whether it's managing symptoms or accompanying him on medical journeys, I'm committed for life."


Mara's journey, marked by academic excellence and unwavering devotion, underscores the transformative power of love and the resilience of the human spirit in the face of adversity.


"In 2015, I graduated as the best student in surgery and overall theory," Mara proudly shares. "That achievement only deepened my commitment to excellence in caregiving."


Mara's caregiving journey has unveiled a powerful revelation: "Never do anything solely to gain from it," she asserts. Witnessing her father's unwavering dedication to others, Mara learned the importance of selfless service without expectation of reciprocation. "In his darkest moments, none of those he lived for are there," Mara reflects, highlighting the stark contrast between her father's altruism and the absence of support during his own struggles.


Navigating her Zambian heritage, Mara emphasizes the cultural differences in caregiving approaches. "In Africa, we stay together. There's no depositing loved ones in nursing homes," Mara explains, underscoring the familial support ingrained in Zambian culture. Her approach to caregiving is deeply rooted in familial bonds, prioritizing her father's comfort and wellbeing within her capabilities.


Amidst cherished moments, Mara recounts the challenges of accessibility faced by wheelchair-bound individuals in Zambia. "Entering buildings without wheelchair access made my dad feel like his rights were denied," Mara reveals, shedding light on the profound impact of physical barriers on her father's well-being."In our home, it was Dad who loved the kitchen," Mara fondly recalls. "While most kids saw moms and sisters as the primary cooks, I grew up with Dad as our family chef. His voice announcing meals ready became our daily routine."Beyond culinary prowess, Mara's father broke societal taboos by openly embracing and celebrating his daughters' milestones, including menstruation."Dad never shied away from acknowledging natural processes like menstruation," Mara explains. "He celebrated it as a sign of maturity, not a topic to be hidden or ashamed of."Mara's college years were marked by a unique sense of pride, as her father's progressive views extended to ensuring his daughters had access to menstrual hygiene products without stigma.


"While other girls found it unusual, I proudly displayed the products Dad bought for me," Mara reflects. "His actions taught me the importance of normalizing discussions around women's health and needs."


Inspired by her father's inclusive mindset, Mara actively joined him in promoting women's empowerment through The African Woman Foundation.


"My dad's mantra—that a woman's value lies in her education, empowerment, and contributions to society—resonated deeply with me," Mara shares. "It stemmed from our upbringing in an open-minded environment that challenged all forms of discrimination."


Mara's father's legacy goes beyond familial bonds; it's a testament to his unwavering commitment to social inclusion and gender equality across Africa.


"I've learned invaluable lessons from Dad's advocacy," Mara said, "His belief in women's potential drives my dedication to empowering others and reshaping societal norms."


When asked for advice, Mara offers profound insights for aspiring caregivers. "Caregiving has no start or end times," she asserts. "The only coping mechanism should be loving the person you care for—that is the fuel you need all the way."


Regarding personal well-being, Mara acknowledges the delicate balance between caregiving and self-care. "If the caregiver has burnout, they will fail," Mara warns, emphasizing the importance of partnership and mutual support between caregivers and their loved ones.


Looking towards the future, Mara's path remains uncertain yet deeply intertwined with her father's well-being. "My life revolves around my sweet dad," Mara admits, highlighting the intrinsic connection that defines her existence. Despite the uncertainty, Mara envisions advocating for caregivers and continuing her father's legacy of love and dedication.


As Mara's journey continues, her unwavering dedication to her father's care exemplifies the transformative power of selflessness and the enduring impact of familial bonds. Through her experiences, Mara leaves behind a poignant legacy of love, compassion, and resilience, reminding us that true fulfillment comes from giving all for the comfort and well-being of those we cherish.Mara's caregiving journey is often solitary, marked by moments of both humor and profound difficulty as she supports her father, Joseph Moyo, through his health challenges."It can be a lonely path," Mara acknowledges. "But there are moments of unexpected humor, like when I carry my father on my back in places without wheelchair accessibility. People find it amusing, and we simply carry on."


Transitioning from a life of service to one of dependency has been especially challenging for Mara's father, who dedicated his life to helping vulnerable communities and individuals.


"My dad struggles with being on the receiving end," Mara explains. "It's a role reversal that weighs heavily on him."


Despite his own health limitations, Mara's father remains a voice for the marginalized, albeit through written media statements.


"His former beneficiaries sometimes visit, hoping he can still assist them," Mara shares. "While he can't offer hands-on help, he advocates for them through various channels."


Amidst these challenges, Mara finds support from American volunteers who previously participated in her father's programs.


"American friends and medical teams continue to offer virtual support," Mara says gratefully. "Zoom calls and medical check-ins bridge the distance and provide invaluable connections."


And also in an interview, Joseph Moyo shared his profound gratitude for his daughter, Mara, whose unwavering dedication has transformed his life. At 66 years old and wheelchair-bound due to health challenges, Joseph is deeply reliant on Mara, 31, not just as a caregiver but as his source of hope, strength, and unwavering support.


Joseph's eyes brighten as he reminisces about Mara's selfless devotion. "Her dedication is immeasurable. She has given up everything—her youth, dreams, and independence—just for me," Joseph beams. "She is a superhuman being. I truly believe if she wasn't here, I would not be alive."


Mara’s role extends far beyond mere caregiving; she is Joseph's lifeline. "She wheels me around, ensures I stick to my treatments, and accompanies me to medical appointments," Joseph explains. "Her presence is therapeutic."One standout moment for Joseph was when Mara carried him on her back to navigate an inaccessible village. "It was touching," Joseph recalls. "From that day on, she always carried me on her back when needed."


Their bond is not just familial; it's a profound friendship. "She is my daughter, friend, nurse, and caregiver—all in one," Joseph affirms. "Her sacrifice has only strengthened our relationship."


Mara’s values of faith and service, instilled by her father's example, guide her caregiving approach. "She doesn’t care about societal norms; she does what's right in the eyes of God," Joseph notes. "Her dedication teaches us the power of true love."


For Mara, caregiving is a calling deeply rooted in her upbringing. "We share the same values of service and giving," Joseph says. "She's practicing what she grew up seeing."


Despite the challenges of his health condition, Joseph’s outlook on life remains optimistic, largely due to Mara's presence. "She provides emotional support that fuels my will to live," Joseph says. "Her gestures—kisses, hugs, and reassuring words—are my source of comfort."


Joseph’s admiration for Mara extends beyond familial pride; it’s a profound acknowledgment of her humanity. "She exemplifies the best of humanity," Joseph reflects. "I am the proudest father."


Looking ahead, Joseph envisions a future where Mara continues to make a difference. "I hope she lives life to the fullest," Joseph muses. "Whatever she chooses, it should be about improving lives."


As Joseph and Mara continue their journey together, their story serves as a testament to the transformative power of love and sacrifice. Joseph's final message to Mara resonates with wisdom: "Service to others is the greatest virtue. Results matter, especially if they positively impact others."


In the legacy of Mara's caregiving story, Joseph hopes to inspire others to embrace kindness and selflessness. "If it inspires even one person to do good without expecting anything in return, then our journey has been worthwhile," Joseph concludes, a glint of pride in his eyes as he gazes at his daughter—the epitome of unconditional love and dedication. 


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